Greetings from Italy!

Hi all! Just thought I'd quickly update you on life in Italy.

So far--oh my goodness. That is about all I can say without going on some crazy rant. I have only been here (in Rome that is) for two days and I'm completely in love with this place. It's romantic, beauitful, and lively. I can't type much right now because I'm on a time limit. I am posting my picutres on facebook now for your viewing pleasure ;). Thus far I've seen the Colluseum, The Palentine, Arch di Augustus, The Pantheon at night, The Vatican and a few other things here and there. I am heading to the Jewish museum/synogogue tomorrow. The Vatican (which we saw today) was just simply beautiful. Intricate, sublime, and awe inspiring, it's no wonder people flock there by the thousands for spiritual experience. The Sistine Chapel is just eye popping and jaw dropping; I could not believe my eyes it was simple incredible. I might go back on Wednesday morning to hear the Pope Speak (he does every Wednesday around 11am) just to say that I did.

Must be off. Writing a few postcards and then heading out to dinner with Omar (one of the many interesting international people I've met on this trip).

Too low to find my way, to high to wonder why...

I don't feel like writing in complete sentences for this post so here's a bulleted one:

• 5 days until Italy--the the excitement is overwhelming. :)
• I just spent my entire day marking and doing house work. I am beginning to LOATH sundays no thanks to teaching...
• The British Gas company is a complete waste of my time and effort--day 5 of not having hot water OR heat (bring on the five million layers of clothing--wahoo!).
• I'm going to end up heading to bed at a ridiculously early time this evening. I really am turning into an old lady...
• Halloween this year brings many interesting things: Coming back from my first experience in Italy, finding out once and for all whether or not this is actually going to happen, my first experience of Halloween in a different country (which should be rather interesting). I still have yet to purchase a costume--do I hear a Cat for the umpteenth year in a row...? I thought so.
• Oh here's a goodie--I went to the Globe this weekend! I had a wonderful time (pictures will be up on facebook) seeing the place where Shakespeare thrived. Managed to pick up a few posters for my classroom (and one postcard for my own personal use). And no, you really cannot say Macbeth within the walls of the theatre; not unless you want have someone force you to leave the building, turn around three times, spit on the floor, knock on the door, and then wait to be let in (or so said the tour guide--who happened to be incredibly pretty--and possibly incredibly gay...).

Well that was my quick post for the evening. I'm pretty much planned for the entire week. I have two and a half more classes to grade and then I can finally get my half term break underway...God do I need this...

And I will go down with this ship...

This weekend was probably the worst weekend I've had here in the UK. Friday night was, to put it bluntly, lame. Saturday after running in the morning, I went into school and did marking/prepping for this week for four hours, lunch/walk in the woods with Jason was lovely (only nice thing about the weekend really...) finally getting my card at HSBC, doing a bit of therapy shopping/drinking with Michelle, and then heading to bed at 11pm (what a Saturday night...). Today after running in the morning, I got myself ready and graded/cleaned/planned all day long. I've been so frustrated with this entire situation that I actually cleaned my ENTIRE house with the exception of my housemates rooms. Swept, hoovered, and wiped down every square inch of the main areas (including my room); A good stress relief (as is this post)--at least when I'm stressed I'm productive. Tonight will be spent finishing my marking of one classes exams, a glass of wine and one of my books.

I'm a bit ticked off that I needed to go into work on a Saturday; my father brought it my attention that I actually worked for the past 8 days straight (Sunday-Sunday). *sigh* I suppose in the back of my mind I knew that this was going to be the case during my first year. I hope that, as I become acclimated with teaching, it becomes easier and I can give myself more "me" time. It's terrible that I feel guilty for taking time out of my day today to clean/do laundry/make and eat dinner. It's like I'm student teaching again--at least I'm getting paid for this. 

Reflecting on the year past...

And so, as the weather continues to grow colder, the people Jewish faith quickly approach Yom Kippur, the day of repentance. It seems rather ironic that Yom Kippur falls during the Autumn season. While the Jews wandered in the desert, one can be quite certain that the change of weather was no where near as apparent as it was/is in other areas of the World. Autumn is a time when life begins to end its cycle once more and we once more reflect on our actions over the course of the past year, hoping to be sealed in the "Book of Life" (Note the term 'hoping.' The other option would be less desirable...). 

All of this can really drive one to have a sit and think...

It is incredible how much an individual can change in the course of one single year. That's 12 months. 52 weeks. 365 days. I won't even try to calculate the hours, minutes, and seconds, but you get my point. Looking back to this time last year, I was a completely different person in many aspects of my life. I was beginning my professional year at Towson and still coming out of a rather difficult summer. One may say that my actions could be seen as rather selfish, and to some degree I agree one hundred percent; however, some of it I feel was rather necessary in order to get to where I am now. Some of my experiences during the beginning months scared me, because I saw an entirely new side of myself that I did not like. And yet, from these rather upsetting experiences came great ones--experiences which opened doors for me and helped me to become ad better person as a whole. Through bettering myself,  I was able to act as a better friend, in turn, gaining the most incredible group of friends I have ever had. Period. This process was not easy, and as stated before, it took me to hit just about rock bottom in order to get back up to where I wanted to be, where I am now, and where I hope to stay for quite some time. 

During my time trying to bring myself up to where I am now, for those of you whom I may have neglected, may have not been the nicest to, and/or perhaps all together fell away from, I have this to say: I apologize whole heartedly. My intentions were NEVER to hurt you, and while you may not want to begin speaking with me again, I hope that you can accept my apology; I never meant to hurt you if I managed to do so. 

As I said before, it took many events to drive me to "rock bottom" so to say, but there was one that you may call the straw that broke the camels back. Jeff, I'm sure you never read this, but on the off chance that you do, I apologize. I apologize for letting the differences in our personalities ruin any civility that we may have had between us. I should have been the mature one in the situation to simply LET IT GO; but of course, hind sight is 20/20, and if I knew even remotely CLOSE to what I know now, well lets just say much of what happened never would have. On the same token, what ever you had said/written/done is and has been long forgotten; in light of Yom Kippur it has also been forgiven. 

There were few of you who have hurt me this year, if any, and for that I am truly lucky/blessed. Those of you who know me well know I, for the most part, do not hold grudges, and so if anything happened between us, you were forgiven long ago.  

I hope that everyone who is observing has a meaningful and thoughtful fast. I am off now to get a bit of dinner and then head in for the evening after a very long and tiring day. 

Save my pennies for a rainy day...

It's officially Autumn here in the British Isles. I believe Wednesday was the first official day, but this weekend has certainly reassured us all that Summer is long gone. The air is cold, crisp, sometimes rainy, and all the times blustery. I don't think I'll be leaving my house for the next 24 hours until I absolutely need to. I've already ruined, per say, the bottoms of two pairs of jeans...I'm not happy. 

This weekend went incredibly quick. Friday night I spent cleaning my room, getting a few things sorted out, indulging in a glass of wine, and then heading to bed at the ghastly hour of 9pm. Welcome to life as a working adult. It's exciting beyond imagination. Seriously. ... Teaching really takes more out of you than one could ever expect. My Friday's tend to be less intense than the rest of the week. Unfortunately, it's all the work that is done AFTER the students leave that really can wipe you out. The monotonous grading of books where students constantly misuse commas, full stops (periods in American), They're/their/there, where/were, effect/affect, accept/except and the list goes on.  It's the need for differentiating in EVERY BLOODY LESSON that causes you to spend three hours on a lesson when it really should only take an hour max; after a while I completely give up and just hope for the best. The silver lining of all this is that I'm not the only one struggling at the moment--most new teachers are and it's reassuring to know that I'm not alone. I could easily see how this section of my post could go off on a rant about how the children of the UK are falling as fast as the children in the US. How their education system is just as messed up and backwards as ours. How this "Every Child Matters" bullshit is just a different name for the "No Child Left Behind" act. But I won't, because I know I've already lost most of you to the next paragraph of this blog. So I'll continue on...

Yesterday was a bit more entertaining. Bri came to visit, which was simply awesome :) It was so nice to see her, especially since it's been almost 2 years! We got a bite of lunch at Ha Ha Grill (really good food, not so wonderful service), headed over to the mall area, walked around, bought a shirt from Monsoon (it was on sale--I can't actually afford clothes in that store) and then headed back to my house. Jason picked me up about 7, though we didn't actually leave until 9. We finally headed over to Stoney Stratford for the evening. The architecture is BEAUTIFUL there, even in the evening and more so even when it's raining/crappy out. We had some amazing Indian food last night, some really wonderful conversation, and then headed over to The Bull (since the other place was closing at 11pm on a saturday night. I was not impressed by this...) for a drink and a sit by the fire. What a nice evening! 

Today will be spent doing laundry, creating powerpoints for my lessons this week, more cleaning, reading and, as my roommate Michelle says, much faffing about :)

Home sickness is setting in a bit right now. I'm not sure if it's the weather, my terrible PMS or a mixture of both. Some things I'm urning for at the moment: Bagel Bin/Bagel Boys, beautiful Autumns in Maryland and New York, trips to Columbia with Lori SCREAMING the Jimmy Eat World song as we speed down 695, early morning autumn runs down Putty Hill, Anny and Chris, crazy nights out with Sarah, Purrrfect Pitch madness, my second home: Starbucks, Susan always reminding me of such, the PNUSSY wagon, spurratic Panera meetings with my Wife, ladies nights out with Erin followed by much complaining about how Mahwah is a TERRIBLE place for people our age, and so much more :(

Sunny Days...

Back in school after a long (though very pleasant) Birthday/Jewish New Year. Southampton was very nice despite the less than decent shul experience. The service was long, the rabbi was okay, the crowd was extremely OLD and the chorus made me (along with Dave and his sister) cringe. The sermon was what I had a real issue with. The title could have been "Leaving our selves and coming back to our selves." This idea that we should not think that our actions do not matter in life, but that in fact, they really do (at this point the small Existential part of me that does exist is going "yeah right..." while throwing any book by Camus at the Rabbi). His over all message was as follows: Doing good will bring you closer to G-d.

Blank stare.

Richard Dawkin's wrote on this issue in his book The God Dilemma. He made the statement that many people only do good in order to please/bring themselves close to God. I find a major flaw in this mindset (mostly stemming from Dawkin's point). If we only perform acts of love and kindness in order to please or become closer to G-d, then does that not make us as sinful as the person who goes out and intentionally performs acts of evil? If we are choosing to do good simply to please ourselves and the almighty being, then truly, we are not "good," but rather looking for that gold star to stick into our notebooks in hopes that, come the end of term, when we're standing at those pearly gates facing that big scary headmaster, he/she sees that we have a plethora of gold stars and enough to enter into Heaven; a selfish mindset indeed. To further this, Dawkins asks what would happen if there was no higher being to please, no one to fear, and no place to fear going to, would people STILL perform acts of love and kindness? One can only hope.

Enough on my religious rant. Unfortunately, this is where my views of organized religion are headed. Don't get me wrong, the culture and the history of the Jewish religion will always be in my heart--forever--there is no doubt about that. Many Jews will agree that Judaism is much more than JUST a religion--it is a people, it is a culture, and it is a nation. However, the existence of God and the over all idea of God itself has truly sparked many questions for me in the past few months or so.

Just to put it out there: it's official (by US standards). *Insert big beaming smile of happiness and joy* If you don't understand what I'm talking about, ask.

I'm at school right now during my free period so I should probably get some work done so I'm not here forever. (This post really has NOTHING to do with my experience teaching--though more about my experience in England...so I suppose it's okay that it's on here...)

More later!